I grew up as the youngest of three sisters. Every year since I can remember my father would bring each of his four girls (my Mom included) a card and a gift. It was a loving gesture. It always made me feel loved and special. It developed one of my strongest love languages: giving and receiving gifts. It fed my little girl view of waiting for my loving man to come and shower me with his love and gifts. That belief and image stayed with me most of my life. The Universe brought me men who showered me with gifts and that just reinforced my belief: my husband, my boyfriends after and then my grown sons.
It has only been the last few years that I have been working on loving myself first and foremost. It has been a journey of introspection and facing my demons and my shadows; both light and dark.
It has been a journey of staying in integrity with my word and staying in alignment with my vision for my future.
Most importantly I have learned that the best way to learn about myself is to be in relationship with another human being. We are all mirrors of each other and the Universe brings us people in our lives to show us what we don’t see in ourselves. I have quoted for years; “You get what you accept”. When we say we want a loving relationship but don’t have one, we are being mirrored back our inability to love ourselves first and foremost.
I feel like I have come so far to be able to be in a relationship where it has become my playground for self-discovery. Instead of over reacting or running away from conflict, I have learned to step back and look at the situation.
What is the quality that is triggering me? (Those are the qualities I don’t see in myself)
What are the feelings that are flooding my central nervous system?
Why is my fight or flight response being triggered?
Why am I trying to sabotage this?
What am I not seeing?
What can I learn from this?
What is the lesson the Universe is handing me on a golden platter?
Why did the Universe send me this partner?
The Universe, sends us the exact medicine we need. So this is my opportunity to take my medicine. As my partner and I settle past the haze of new love, we begin to go through the growing pains of a new relationship. It is my hope that we will both bend towards each other and bring exactly what the other needs for the evolution of our souls. I was never before in a place to do this work with a partner. I was always the reactor and not the observer. I never thought in terms of what was I to learn and how could I grow? This is the most exciting time and the greatest Valentine’s gift I have ever received. Best yet, it is a gift I give myself. It is my testament to my self-love and the evolution of my soul. I can’t remember a time I have been this centered or peaceful. My life is full and I am so grateful. (Not the least from the added love of my three precious granddaughters)
So today, as I wish myself and my partner a very Happy Valentine’s Day; I also invite you to share the gift of this opportunity. Let life happen For you, not To you. The Universe is our greatest gift giver: love yourself first and foremost and watch as your gifts unfold.
Happy Valentine’s Day,