Dear 2017,

Dear 2017,

Dear 2017, Here we are! I am so happy to be here with you.  I spent a good amount of time in reflection as 2016 came to an end. What did I achieve and what do I still want to achieve and how will I get there? What were my lows, and what did I learn?  What were my highs and what did I learn? What am I most grateful for from both the highs and the lows?  I know I worked hard at fulfilling personal dreams and aspirations.  Leaning, growing, working, trying.  Trying and doing and more trying and more doing. I feel like the end of 2015 was just here and I was doing the familiar reflection then and the year before and then in a  blink of an eye, I will be reflecting on 2017 as I step in to 2018.  It is a little scary how fast time moves and how many things I accomplished and yet how many things I haven’t achieved yet.  Obviously, I have more control over some of my intentions and desires and some are still a work in progress as my perceived desires are still in conflict with my underlying commitments and shadows.  For sure I know;  If I desire something but still have not achieved it, then there is still something I am more committed to than what I say I want. I know fear is telling me to protect my heart.  To that end, I never let someone in to the most scared interior regions of my heart and until I can completely let go; I will never...
After the Fall

After the Fall

  I am on the plane heading home from my trip to Thailand.  This trip was unbelievable on so many levels that I am still processing its innumerable elements.  One thing that stands out is how indescribable it is to travel alone.  I am blown away at how long it took me to do this.  All those years of searching for someone to travel with me and feeling more than once like a victim. Once again I see that playing the victim does nothing but limit one’s life. I speak often in my coaching about victimhood.  Just like all the other times that giving up victimhood leads to major AHA moments; this was no different.  I was excited the whole time to be making it work and getting around and I couldn’t believe how wonderful all the people were that I met.  First I was at a beautiful emotional and physical detox spa and I don’t think I met another person from the States the whole time I was there.  That was such a different experience for me.  I felt very international.  Connecting was easy.  I am gifted with the ability to open to others which facilitates their opening up to me.  The fact that most people were there working on something, made it even more intriguing.  A group of us just became a little discussion group, openly discussing what was coming up around our sessions with the most amazing coaches and energy workers I ever experienced.  Unlike most of the people I met, I didn’t come with an agenda.  I came because as a coach I am always...
Loving Yourself is Just the First Step

Loving Yourself is Just the First Step

For most of my adult life I had romantic love, and then I didn’t and then I had it again and so on and so on and so on. Always the having or not having. Always the joy or the heartbreak. Always the quest. I have spent endless hours discussing countless scenarios with my girlfriends. Women can spend more time discussing love and lovers or the lack there of than men, even in their wildest imaginations, could imagine. We collude with each other and conjecture what we should or shouldn’t do or what the man meant or feels or doesn’t.  It’s exhausting and yet we never stop. Endless and painful and yet comforting and familiar.  Recently, I realized I was looking for love in all the wrong places. I realized that love had to come from “within” and not from “out there”. My go to belief was that self-integrity was paramount to achieving self-love. One’s word is not only golden but it is the quickest avenue to achieving self- love. But I know now that self-integrity is not enough. To truly love oneself, we also need to self-actualize. We need to be living up to our soul’s potential. We need to be at least moving in that direction.  We need to understand we have a purpose on this earth, each time we come around. This purpose transcends the drama of our lives. We need to be bigger than our littleness.  These last four years have been an interesting journey for me. A never-ending journey of introspection and learning and growth and self-discipline. I have been learning to love both my divinity and my humanity. My awesomeness and my flawsomeness....
Stepping Up

Stepping Up

    Bucket lists are an interesting phenomenon.  For me, they are more than just a list of somedays and maybes but they stand as a call to action.  They call to me, pull me towards them, shouting at me at times that the only thing keeping them on my list are my own fears. They seem harmless enough when I add them to my list but in reality they act as reminders that I am allowing myself to play small and not live to my full potential.  They leave me feeling disempowered and disappointed.  I put them on my list lovingly, but they mock me and tell me that in order to have the life I envision, I need to move past my fears and play all out. So I have taken steps to move past my fears.  I am consciously choosing to  put my faith into my faith and move forward and play all out. I have never taken a big  international trip alone and yet I give my light away to women who do.  I am always so impressed and always wonder why I don’t do that.  I feel like it is a very important step in my self-actualization.    So I have booked a magnificent trip to Thailand for 18 days.  I am going to do a bike trip, and then a beautiful yoga, meditation and detox retreat.  I am really excited and I feel energized and powerful. My second item that I have taken off my bucket list has been so transformational that I wish I had done it years ago and I recommend it...
Navigating the Big Birthday

Navigating the Big Birthday

  Birthdays are such an interesting event. The date is always special to us-we all think of that “date” and always remember it. It is ours! Some people like to celebrate the whole week but we all at least acknowledge the day. I need to give thanks to the Universe for blessing me with yet another year on this beautiful planet. I am thankful for my life and everything the Universe has been teaching me these last few years. I feel like I am my own emotional science project. Being the observer instead of the reactor is so much more interesting for me. That doesn’t mean I don’t get triggered but they are so much less often and so much less reactive. My initial reaction is the same but I quickly recover as I do my work to uncover the shadow belief or wound. This birthday has really had me in a tizzy because I am turning 60! I honestly don’t know how this happened. Yesterday I was in my forties and running marathons and dancing on tables. (Yes, I have been known to dance on tables). 60 is such a substantial number. I can’t even pretend that I am still middle age. I think I just hit the beginning of old age. I look in the mirror and 60 is not looking back at me but I know it is true. But there is no alternative that beats growing older so I am here to embrace my birthday and my age. The nice thing about having so many friends for so many years is that most of us...

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